Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
only if we run a train.
done.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
