The maid of honor just puked.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Randomize
