All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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