Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize