he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
