Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
