Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
