Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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