Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
