I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize