nut hugger
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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