My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
