Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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