Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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