Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
