I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
