I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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