we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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