We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
And then my night got REAL pukey
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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