Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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