Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I want to make a zoo with you.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
