And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
i think my cat just said my name.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
