oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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