You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
