Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Why is your signature on my underwear?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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