Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
