so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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