This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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