I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
