Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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