Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
