can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Randomize
