She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
