Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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