I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
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