i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
