I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
