i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
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