Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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