So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
My vagina just recognized that song.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
