I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
She announced her abortion via fbk
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize
