I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
