At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I think a kid would responsible me up
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
