dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
