Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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