If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
they call him Oral-B. enough said
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
