somebody snuck up and got me drunk
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
