wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
