OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
