put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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